I can’t “sell” myself

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I just found out I haven’t been successful in another one of my applications to get my art seen. I just don’t think I know how to sell myself. I suppose each time I get knocked back at least I’m less disappointed. If people don’t like what I do that is not my fault or theirs x. It’s just a case of taste. I’m not going to let it get to me  I shall just try harder next time and try and do better research. Being an artist is not easy, but it’s good to be creative. I won’t give up.

Fuzzy brain

Finished or almost finished? Not sure. I’ve spent the last two days painting this while having my studio open to the public. In the end you lose track of what you are doing. What you are saying. I can waffle forever but it stops making sense after a while.

I like people to ask me questions about art. But then I get nervous. It’s like a fog descends over my head and I can’t articulate or describe what I mean. I hope my paintings are pretty self explanatory but I still try and explain what I am doing. Artists on TV seem to be able to tell people what they are doing, but I can’t do that. I’m a painter not a public speaker…..

So anyway, I finished this painting today. It’s called mermaid.

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Fluffy clouds

 

Fluffy clouds, mares tails and con trails at Spode today. I loved the way the sky was crossed and patterned with clouds. The sun was quite low and now we have moved into autumn it took on that crisp shimmer when the heat of summer has all but been extinguished from the sky. The warmth seems to wash out of the blue and it becomes a deeper hue.

Round about the skeletal remains of parts of the spode site sit like dinosaur ribs, shed of flesh and skin, one gaunt necklike chimney sits upright looking out over the landscape of rust and broken bricks.

All this hides the beating pulse of creativity, artists, ceramacists and other makers populate the various untidy buildings. Glass and clay, paint and photography, laser cutting and architecture. All of them dwell under the fluffy white clouds, mares tails and con trails.

Next weekend we are having an OPEN studio. On the 6th and 7th of October.

Admission is free from 11am to 4pm. You are welcome to come into the studios which are open to the public. There will be much to see including a new exhibition of people’s work on the theme of transition. We are at the Spode site, Elanora Street, Stoke, Stoke-on-Trent. The way in will be signposted.

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What day would I go back to?

All the days in our lives,

Stretch out at first, then shrink,

Behind us, gone.

No rewind button for life,

No voicemail recording our every word.

Gone, long ago,  barely remembered. ..

What day would I go back to?

To hear parents voices again, and tell them

How much I loved them?

Or the first day at school, tell myself not to be so shy?

Trying to make perfume from rose petals as a child

Or older, wiser, learning to drive.

Time travel is a one way street, into the future.

If I could go back I would be pleased to meet you again.

Maybe visit a few less railways,

And see the sea a few more times.

Go back to holidays in Devon.

If I could go back I would say,

Don’t take that awful job,

Stay safe and well.

Don’t waste your life for a pay packet,

Let’s live and love.

 

Youdraw pictures

Imagine a website where you can only draw in a small oblong in portrait mode. Imagine you only have a thick and thin black pen and a thick and thin white eraser. Then imagine drawing complicated images with only these tools.

That’s Youdraw, I don’t go on it anymore because my old computer is defunct and my tablet does not let me use a proper stylus pen.

The images above are my drawings, taken from the site and then changed in Photoshop so that I could colour them.

I found it captivating to be able to use the site to  draw so many ideas. The shape was better suited to portraiture, but you could fit landscapes in, abstract ideas, botanical images, anything black and white. Some of the artists there could draw incredibly detailed pictures, one person at least built up a huge interconnected picture of 100 images, maybe more.

If you go and have a look at Youdraw.com you can see what is there now.  I’m not sure if its still taking images. The plan was to collect 500,000 drawings to publicise the population explosion on Earth.

Hopefully I will go back and draw there again one day.

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Studio time?

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I have not been in for a while to my studio. I haven’t settled in. I was OK for a while, but I cocoon myself at home. I wish I could relax and fit in better there.

I find myself going out to other places drawing or painting. But I’m not knuckling down to work. I hope I can break the spell and get on with things. I seem to be half enthusiastic and half despondent. It’s maddening.

I have other reasons that I’m struggling with, but I’m not going into details. Just added frustrations that make things difficult.

Does anyone else feel like this!? Or is it just me….. I have ideas but don’t act on them. People must get really fed up with me being so lacadazical.

Then of course there is the attraction of places like this…am I noise in an empty container? Well I will put this down and try and break free…for a while…